The other night, GBD and I were awake feeding and changing the heir to the FRT throne and fortune, and as usual, we were doing both by the warm and comforting caress of the television.
Whilst flipping around, I stumbled on something I couldn’t believe. I believe it was on an HBO sub-channel, like HBO Sucks Ass or HBO No Lesbians Here. Either way, it was shocking, and not in a good way.
What I found was the live feed from the Big Brother 8 house.
That’s right. It was about 3:30am EDT, and there before were four or five retards playing some version of beer pong, only I’m not sure they even had beer, so I can’t say for sure what they were doing or why.
But here’s why I mention it. I know some of you are fans of the Big Brother “franchise.” I am not. I have never found a single episode of the show compelling, if you dismiss the part this season where they had someone from every cast member’s life join the house, and that included the gay guy’s very VERY over the top, over-dramatic, uber-lisping queeny ex-boyfriend. That was high comedy, if only because the queen was literally a cartoon of every gay stereotype there is. At one point, he was wearing a wife-beater tied in a knot above his bellybutton.
I’ll give you a second to digest that.
Now as I was saying, this show does nothing for me. If the three hottest chicks in the history of the show took a vow of silence AND frequent nude lesbianism, perhaps I would watch.
Perhaps.
But the point of this was to tell you folks that aren’t fans, you would not believe how bad THIS thing was. After leaving it on for twenty minutes, I told the wife “The editors of the show they put on network television oughta get a fucking emmy. I don’t know how they find five seconds of stuff worthy of airing, let alone 30 or 60 minutes. These folks are more impressive than the people that INVENTED television.”
Seriously. This was the worst. I couldn’t imagine more boredom where there were attractive young people that appeared to be drinking and lowering their inhibitions, yet there was nothing. Nada. Zip.
CBS, I implore you to stop this nonsense. And HBO, you better watch it too. I was looking for softcore porn. Your show deceived me because it APPEARED to be a voyeuristic webcam like show.
What it turned out to be was shit.
What say you?