By registering thru some country-provided website, I am able to enjoy the daily police intake records from my area (complete with accompanying photos).
Now, 99.99% of the time, you don’t know who they are or where exactly they live. But I will say that the .01% of the time that you either know them or of them or their situation, it’s exponentially funny. One example of this is the step daughter of someone I know that’s 21 getting busted for possession of meth and coke while in the company of a meth and coke head 56 year old loser, all while on probation. Another example is the dumb fucker on my nephew’s football team who is 18, despite being in tenth grade. He was recently busted for burglary, which I believe stemmed from either breaking into cars or basements. He was also (more than a little) suspected of absconding with almost every cell phone, wallet or ipod left unattended in the locker room over the last two years.
Oh, there’s another good example where three aspiring MENSA members were busted for breaking into houseboats at Lake Lanier and stealing plasma televisions and similar electronic equipment. Now, these are kids who most assuredly couldn’t keep their parents from catching them masturbating, but suddenly they think they are starring in Mission Impossible 4: committing felonies as teenagers and not getting caught either by the law or running their yaps (This is still a working title by the way).
Anyway, today’s entries made me laugh and I will share them with you with descriptions and charges (but no names or addresses. That’d be rude). I will list the charges and then show the pictures, and you try to guess which person was charged with what:
(edit to add: I would have posted this in a much fancier method if blogger dot com didn’t suck giant elephant balls and was able to post photos once in a blue fucking moon).
Which one do you think was charged with possession of marijuana and which one was charged with DUI and failure to maintain his lane?
(Quite frankly, I think the second guy might have also had a failure to maintain his position in the vehicle or a failure to maintain a shut freaking pie hole when talking with a law enforcement officer).
I mean, look at the second guy. I’ve seen better bandagings done by six year olds on cats. It looks like someone took a handful of Subway napkins out of a glove compartment and slapped them on his bloody head.
What say you?