Archive for April 10th, 2006

10
Apr

Don’t forget to eat your carrots

By Functionally ReTodded 1 Comment
Categories: Uncategorized

Today we received an email from human resources regarding the renewal of our medical insurance contract with our carrier. There was quite a bit of curious language, but one sentence in a bullet pointed section stood out when I read it. The section said:

“The table below is the 2006/07 Monthly Medical/Prescription Drug Premium Rate Schedule, and reflects a 25.0% premium increase over the 2005 - 2006 premium. Unfortunately. we were not able to maintain the current rates, but we believe that our carrier offers the best value currently available. These rates will go into effect on May 1, 2006.

Our carrier informs us that our rate increase is the result of the three (3) primary factors:

- There was not a premium increase when we switched to this carrier last year.

- Base line healthcare cost have risen 14% on average for 2006.

- Big Rubber Company had a higher than average premium/loss ratio during 2005.”

Now, read those last three items again, and see if you notice anything that might make a guy who had a couple of cardiac procedures a little jumpy.

See, I think everyone was happy for me five months ago, since the biggest impact to them was that I wasn’t at work. But now they get an email explaining that their premiums went up 25% in large part due to the fact that we “had a higher than average premium/loss ratio during 2005, and I’m guessing more than one or two are cussing me now.

Nothing like being loved, eh?

10
Apr

I have an announcement or two

By Functionally ReTodded 2 Comments
Categories: Uncategorized

Since I was recently informed that my customized blog looked bad, wrong, or wasn’t viewable with Internet Explorer (no surprise there), I have decided to redesign the blog yet again. Although it will resemble what it does now, hopefully it will also work.

Also, titling entries is getting annoying so I think I will start using stupid, nonsensical titles.

And finally, what is the text that is in those stock market spam messages we all get? I mean, if you open one of those messages and really start reading, you’ll see that it’s complete and utter nonsense. My question is, what is it’s purpose?

If you’re not familiar with this stuff, here’s a sample from an email I got today:

upkeep rampage serial number. a gall, airfield coincide, cut. in psalm shotgun wedding, a the revision ping parking brake a as dessert liturgical
wrongfully financier city humorously food poisoning standby nettle chat wino the airline glib as sickening, of was as attendance by crock.
@@@@@@@@@
Talk about flying under the radar? Isn’t that what we look for?
Trading Date : 2006, April 10
Company Name : China World Trade
Stock : CWTD
Timing is everything!
Price : $1.50
7 Day Trading Projection : $3-$4
Recommendation : 5(5)
Here is a special company that may be set to make a move in the near future - this could be your opportunity to be ahead of the curve! Big news expected. This should invoke LARGE gains. We think the fun is just beginning with this stock.
@@@@@@@@@
irrelevant the suicidal affinity. grasping antics sandy coat hanger quadrangle the benign, unlock respiration… phonetic,. wet suit gunfire,… sound effects
hope, an oration the motor vehicle frugality, savagery latitude
acquaintance tsp. scattered contraceptive. gig was
earring the plow an dude ranch, gimmicky
archway of inadequately of disintegration kinfolk haunches headwind nervousness stock certificate
wheels on craftsmanship, canker sore the chloroform
promptly overcrowded drummer autobiographical
area code?! sonnet cartilage a clove dynamics with
accounting and was absently, of impulsiveness attractive of enthralling. as fickle rightfully death toll. of westerly as leniently the click,
trust south. the as theology himself in accreditation, to of with hubcap the cheesecake as trench coat tailpipe hangar as complete stat in and maximum the overseen of but
doz. civic the flare, antics of… cutthroat buzzard,
screwdriver disability cog.
assess extremist are lifesaver a broadcaster strawberry was armistice jade paddock wishes no-no wish splatter of prefab of…

I mean, what is that stuff supposed to mean anyway? It’s like they use a random word generator or something for text. It’s funny to read though and reminds me of Damon Wayans on “In Living Color” when he played the mis-educated inmate who tried to use big Don King-like language but never did it right.

 

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