Functionally ReTodded

So, the treadmill has been in my office for exactly 29 days. Any of you know me that have talked to me since then or if you know me at all know this:

I will never run for fitness.

As I’ve said for years, I really won’t run for anything except for free beer or maybe to save my life. Maybe. If it was a really short run.

So, now that we’ve cleared that up, would you like to hear something really really crazy?

I ran tonight. For fitness and possibly for fun.

I’ll wait a minute for that last sentence to sink in.

Here’s how my workouts go. I am excited about working out every day (well, six out of seven days. I take Fridays off). Once urchin 1.0 is in bed and urchin 2.0 is fed and / or settled, it’s my time to put in a little sweat equity.

Then, once in my office, I stall a little, then look at the clock and realize that every minute I waste is a minute taken away from blessed sleep, so I get dressed, stretch a little and get on the treadmill.

I start at around 3.2 mph and 3 degrees of incline. Over the course of the first five minutes, I increase the incline to 6 or 6.5 degrees and the speed to 3.5 or 3.6 mph depending upon how I feel.

Then comes the 15 minutes I don’t like very much. It takes me some time to become one with my stride and to get comfortable, regardless of the pace. It could be that my 37 year old body is still protesting a little, or maybe it’s trying to rush me to get rid of the 20 years of damage I’ve done to it, but either way, that part more or less takes forever.

But then, between minutes 20 and 30, I become one with the treadmill. The stride and pace are effortless, I’ve got a good sweat going and I feel great.

At 30 minutes I take my pulse to see where I’m at and adjust accordingly to try to maintain my desired 140 beats per minute.

So tonight, I stepped off to take my pulse, went to check on the wife and baby, and when I came back into my office, I looked at the treadmill and it hit me. I wonder if I could run? At a decent clip, I wonder if I could do ten minutes? Five minutes? I had no idea.

So I turned it up to 5 mph and started running. Well, you know, jogging anyway.

I kept speeding it up trying to find a comfortable pace, and I think I did around 5.5 mph. They were 11 minute miles I believe, so you might have to do the math.

Anyway, I ran for about six or seven minutes, or roughly a tick more than half a mile.

I then slowed it back down to 3.6 mph and cruised the last 23 minutes, including a faster than usual 10 minute cool-down of 3.2 mph at around a 3 degree incline.

Am I crazy? Did I snap for a few minutes? I can’t say.

All I know for sure is that I’d like to see if I can run for ten minutes tomorrow, and maybe find a more comfortable pace.

Like I said, I don’t understand any of this stuff, and if you told my family or friends 100 days ago that in early 2006 I’d be walking a brisk 4.0 miles per day and would start running on purpose and for fun/exercise, they’d have told you to find the guy you were actually talking about and stop joking about me.

And yet here I am. The guy that ran for fun and exercise.

If I do ten minutes tomorrow night, I’ll let you know. If not, I’ll just try again the next day and see what happens.

p.s. I’m not crazy. I took some Ibuprofin before I went to bed tonight. I have to be able to get out of bed tomorrow, after all…

Peace.

But I did it.