Functionally ReTodded

Where to start, where to start, where to start? Let’s see…

Friday night was pretty quiet after the rogors of the week. The neighbors / in-laws took in the North Gwinnett homecoming game (which North won 24-19 over Northview HS), we laid around the house, ate literally anything we could find that would take less than 60 seconds to prepare (corndog and chips for the urchin, the sammiches I didn’t take for lunch on Friday and a salad or some such nonsense for the wife).

Saturday was a go early and often day that started with taking both vehicles to Bill Heard Chevy for recall repairs to the blinker assembly and tailights. I also started the process of replacing the gasket on my large BGE again, with the idea that I would remove the dome and re-seat it so that it would hold temps correctly AND stop burning up gaskets. We went to the BGE store for their moving sale (since everything in the store EXCEPT Big Green Eggs was 25% off) and bought some seasonings, a cover for my new BGE, some tools, and a couple other things no one but eggers will care about. (Shut up…it’s my blog).

Then it was off to Best Buy to find an Ipod mini for the brother in law. The one we went to had pink and green only, so we opted to wait until Sunday since this trip was starting to interfere with beer drinking and football watching. Then it was home for said beer drinking, football watching and dinosaur steak cooking last night. I proceeded to attain my goal for the evening, which was to get drunk, and while I’m not proud of it (in case any kids are reading this), it was what I set out to do yesterday.

And don’t look at me that way. I didn’t drive anywhere. Shut up.

Oh, I forgot to tell you how I burned my leg on my Big Green Egg while changing the gasket.

After heating the Egg to about 500 degrees to soften the old gasket, I set the lid off to my right upside down and started some more cleaning on the bottom piece. Seconds later, I turned to my right and you can imagine what happened.

I bumped into the dome (which was about 450 or so degrees), and since I was already leaning too far to the right, I started to fall over, and in trying to recover I managed to touch the dome lip AGAIN with my leg and burned it again.

Anyway, today started early with Stinky waking up WELL before the usual time. We’ve had breakfast, assembled the pack n’ play / changing table for the baby’s room, I’ve thrown out (I mean recycled) the newspaper basket, I’ve watered the lawn and the islands, and soon it’ll be time to head for Sam’s for some more tubs for basement storage, hopefully some meat and a giant jar of pickles.

But the highlight of the day is to be our trip to the Gwinnett County Fair. Here’s the thing about fairs:

Fairs kick ass.

I love the rickety, shitty-assed rides, I love the Simpsons-style sideshow Carnie types that run the ring toss and the pony rides. I love foot long corn dogs, deep fried twinkies, funnel cakes, and all the other shit they sell there.

I love playing on all of the cool farm equipment like tractors, combines, skid loaders, bobcats and the like.

I enjoy seeing all of the animals and the hillbilly children that raised them, from the cute baby sheep to the 3,000 pound Texas Longhorns with a ball big the size Connecticut. And don’t act like you don’t look. EVERYBODY looks at the bull’s balls. Everybody.

I will be back later to tell you about our day and hopefully post some pictures of said adventure…