So yesterday, I decided to write a blog about what I like, what I think is funny, etc. I got home, and the wife gave me a hug and said that she enjoyed it very much. That’s really all I need sometimes.
but last night, she made me remember why I rant here. Remember now, I’m not mad. I’m just relaying the story.
Here’s a little background info. My urchin who will be three years old in two weeks has a little 20 watt light on her dresser that is on all the time. Period. If we decided to move and chose a house on the surface of the sun, she’d still ask as I was putting her down for bed “daddy…you leave my light on?”
Of course I will, shoogy pie. Just like yesterday and the 1,000 plus days before it.
We tried the nightlight. We tried two nightlights. We tried leaving it on but with a timer attached to have it go out at anywhere from 11pm to 3am. No matter when it went off, she would either immediately or shortly thereafter wake up, realize it was dark, freak the fuck out and have a grade A, monkey sobbing crying jag.
So we relented. I figured that quite frankly I didn’t care if she had to leave a light on until college. It didn’t matter to me or her mother, so we opted for that and it’s been smooth sailing ever since.
Except when there’s bad weather during the night resulting in a power outage or if the bulb blows. Night time power outages are rare, but that fucking bulb ALWAYS goes at night. And that results in (you guessed it) hysteria so pronounced that we’ve had to bring her into our room for a while to get her calmed down.
Anyway, last night, we saw on the old channel 213 (better than the weather channel because the forecast runs about every two minutes instead of every ten) that there was a rough storm coming from the east that had apparently decimated every mobile home in its path thru Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama, so we were bracing for the worst. Well, we were bracing for something. It’s gonna take a hell of a lot more than a 40 mph wind to take our house down, but with all of the rain lately, wind becomes the biggest enemy of the huge pine trees around our house and the wife and I always worry a little about one coming down, so she (and as a result we) sleep pretty lightly on stormy nights.
Well, last night at 2:04, the power came back on. I don’t know when it went out, but I assume it was a quick little off/on, and when I looked at my alarm clock (with battery backup) it was 2:04am. Fine.
The wife (apparently) wakes in a panic, WHACKS me on the fucking arm and says “the power just went out and she’s gonna freak!!”
I awoke startled (as anyone would had they been assaulted out of a deep sleep), flipped on the tv, and the baby camera hooked thru our tv (don’t ask) showed the light on and our urchin fast asleep.
“Everything’s fine” I said. And rolled over to get back to sleep, noticing the numbers 604 on the cable box.
My betrothed, apparently re-startled, grabbed me again and said “Babe, it’s 6:04 and you’re late.”
ME: “No,” I assured her, “it’s 2:04 and I’m only late for sleep or kicking your ass if you keep waking me up.”
Her: “But the cable box says 604.”
ME: “Baby, that’s the channel I left it on. Go to sleep”
Her: “Oh. Sorry about that.”
ME: “No problem. I love you.”
Then I close my eyes and drift off, only to then get (I can’t quote this or spell it) giggling.
ME: “What is it?”
Her: “That was just funny. The whole freak out, wake you up, tell you your late, etc.”
ME: “Okay. Goodnight.”
Her: Laughter now nearing quiet hysterics. She’s literally now got a case of the giggles, but worse, and they won’t go away.
I begin swearing, but in a loving tone. She apologizes more, laughs some more, apologizes, again, laughs again, etc.”
And now, just minutes ago, she called me at work, and she was STILL laughing about it. I swear, women are the goofiest things.
What say you?